When Full-Time Isn't *Always* Full-Time

For all intents and purposes I've been "full-time" since September of 2012.  One notable exception to that is when I have a laser appointment.  I can't wear makeup to the appointment and while I did wear my wig to one of them since I had errands to run afterwards that was a problem as the hair on it is short enough you can't really tie it back and it got in the way of the numbing cream so I had to remove it and after it sat on the counter for 90 minutes (60 minutes for the cream to work and 30 for the session, etc) it was in such bad shape I couldn't do much with it.  So on those days I have to revert to basically what I'd call looking androgynous.  That's not all that bad as I now normally try and go directly there and come directly home so it's not like I'm out and about.  However, in order to get a really good shave and not go in with my skin irritated I tend to have to not shave a day or two in advance of the appointment and depending upon how the session goes it's usually at least a day or two (in some cases several days), before I'm able to start wearing makeup again.

So even though I'm only going every two months now, there's usually nearly a week's time where I can't really present as Madison.  Early on it didn't really bother me, but the last few months it has.  I'm happy to be me, I'm happy with how I look (at least most of the time), I enjoy getting out and about, and it's frustrating to either have to stay home or to have to compromise my appearance for those days.  It's my understanding that electrolysis won't be much better as I believe you have to let the hairs grow out a bit first and then my face may still be broken out afterwards.  I just wish this would wrap up - it's getting closer as my cheeks only have a hair here or there, but my lip area and my chin - really the sides of my chin - still need work.

The reason this came up is that I happened to get a bonus this check and my check happened to hit on Saturday instead of Monday like it should; and at the last minute I found out the bonus was to be a bit more than I had been told.  Now let's face it, J and M put up with a lot from me, be it helping me with makeup, hair, mannerisms, etc., be it dealing with my emotional swings, and so on; so I thought a nice lunch would be a good idea.  M has a thing for lobster - myself, not so much - I tend to think of them as "water roaches", but to each their own.  When I see lobster tails on sale I'll usually try and pick up some for her and J since they do like them and they are low calorie for the most part.  Well it seems that everybody is currently running lobster specials, including Red Lobster having their LobsterFest.  I agreed to take them there for lunch yesterday; but hadn't given any thought to the fact that my laser appointment was this evening (it was supposed to be Saturday, but J's schedule at work changed).

So I was left with either cancelling on them which didn't seem right, or simply presenting androgynous instead.  Neither option was great, but the latter seemed like the better of the two so we went with that.  Now I don't have any male clothing (other than a couple of work polos, and two pairs of khakis), so this consisted of black panties, women's blue jeans, black bra, black cami, black keyhole top, and last but not least what I guess I'd call a black poncho over it; along with two sets of stud earrings, a tasteful necklace, and flats.  My nails are always done and right now they happen to have a nice red gel polish with some silver sparkles so they stand out.  In the past, I probably would've tried to tone things done, perhaps taken the polish off, forsaken the jewelry, maybe worn tennis shoes, or so on.  But at this point I really didn't care; in the past I felt out of place when I dressed like that, and while I guess I still did yesterday.  I didn't think about that; I simply thought about how agitated I was that I couldn't go out looking nice instead.  But even that shouldn't have been the case, I did look nice - from the neck down - and I guess that's where the frustration lies.  Until the facial hair is no longer an issue I guess I have no choice but to live with these occasional occurrences, but they do stink.

I will say the food and service were both excellent.  I'm not a lobster person as I mentioned above so I had some platter with shrimp, clams, scallops, and fried fish; along with a caesar salad, those great cheddar biscuits and we all split a sampler platter with clams, chicken strips, and stuffed mushrooms.  However, their food really looked good, they both got "Dueling Lobster Tails" or whatever they call it - here is a picture of each.  The first one is M's as she got her's as is:

M's "Dueling Lobster Tails" - ordered "as-is"

And here is J's, she swapped out the mashed potatoes (and apparently the green beans too, although that was NOT supposed to be the case) for some lower calorie vegetables.  Still looked great:

J's "Dueling Lobster Tails" - ordered with steamed veggies

As much as I normally won't eat lobster, I will saw I was a bit jealous of their meals, mine was good but their's looked way better.  Not sure it was worth what it cost, but I figured a nice lunch was a small payment for all they do for me.

In the meantime I need to get some work done as I need to leave a bit early for our laser appointment, I'm a bit under the weather so I'm curious how that affects the pain I'll feel.  Regardless though I'd gladly accept the pain in exchange for my face not breaking out for a change as I'd like to get out of the house as Madison as I haven't much lately because of the surgery recovery and the weather and it's frustrating.

Gotta run...

- M