That being said, while the questions are on occasion more personal than I'd like, I tend to feel it is more beneficial to answer most, if not all of them, than to avoid them and/or get offended/upset. Why do I feel that way? Well, perhaps I'm overly idealistic, but I like to think that it is better for not only myself, but hopefully other trans-men and trans-women to try and educate people about things. Is it rude of people to ask me about my "parts"? Yes it is, just as it would be rude to ask a cis-gender person about theirs. But even this question, I answer, albeit with a simple "That's a bit personal, but since you asked, I'm pre-op, but I plan to have surgery at some point." Another common semi-rude question would be "so who's the boy?", and depending upon who is asking the question that one will be answered either jokingly with "J is", or more seriously something along the lines of "we don't define our relationship that way, we love each other as we are and we are happy with that.".
I know that how I handle it is probably not the way that most people reading this would and that's fine. Some might even make the argument that it's detrimental that I answer those questions since it encourages that kind of behavior. While I can understand that argument, I personally believe the way I answer those do more good than anything. If the person is truly that rude, then either way nothing is going to change. However, if the person simply doesn't know any better or doesn't realize how personal those kind of questions are - then hopefully the way I answer them does help going forward.
Just my few cents on things, as always agree or disagree, but hopefully it's at least something to think about.
- M
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